Journal #6

Character Profile Worksheet

Basic Statistics

Name: Ewa Mistique

Age: 25

Nationality: Polish and Italian

Socioeconomic Level as a child:

Socioeconomic Level as an adult:

Hometown: New York

Current Residence: A condominium in downtown Manhattan

Occupation: Newspaper columnist/Journalist

Talents/Skills: Social, can sing, recreational writer and occupational writer,

Salary: $ 30,510 per year

Birth order: Her, her sister

Siblings (describe relationship): She has a sister, Regina, only a year younger than she. They were close as children because of their age they were highly relatable. They stuck together through bullies, friendships, relationships, and family issues. But since Essence moved out the house and into college, they drastically were separated because of new environments, customs, and morals. Now Essence is pregnant and she can’t tell her sister or parents, because they didn’t know she was even dating.

Parents (describe relationship): Her parents are still married; they have been for 20 years. They’ve been pretty peaceful throughout the girls’ high school years. But for some reason, when Ewa was younger, she was disciplined physically too much. It’s caused a rift between her parents and herself, but Regina always stood by their side. She was the “queen” of the family, which by default made Ewa the “rebel”.

Children (describe relationship): She doesn’t have children … yet.

Significant Others (describe relationship): Her parents never understood Ewa’s true reason behind her breaking away from the family tree. Since she was a young teen, she’s felt unusual about sexual orientation. While all her girl friends dated young boys and went off to experiment, she was stuck, feeling crazy for her actual girl friends. She knew it wasn’t normal for a traditional European family, and her parents could never find out. In that way, she kept to herself, secretive about her goals and dreams, she stopped growing a relationship with her family. Her sister didn’t even know. But behind it all, Ewa was dating; women. Secretly married to this woman, Essence, for four years, they decided to test the process of in-vitro. Her wife is a child psychologist, who sometimes works closely with detectives in child-abuse cases. They met while Ewa was writing an article about a local ACS case.

Relationship skills: She’s easygoing and puts her wife first. Her wife is the only person she can trust so she doesn’t mind setting some goals aside or making her relationship with her a priority. She’s good at mediating issues, even if they’re simply between an argument Ewa and her wife had. She’s peaceful and doesn’t usually remark on things that would cause a problem or instigate.

Physical Characteristics:

Height: 5’’8

Weight: 120

Race: Caucasian/European

Eye Color: Blue

Hair Color: Brown with blonde streaks

Glasses or contact lenses? Contact lenses

Skin color: Fare-skinned

Shape of Face: Oval

Distinguishing features: Pursed, full lips. Elegant hands with long fingers and a silver band on her left ring finger.

How does he/she dress? She dresses professionally- pencil skirts, collared shirts, fancy high heels, thin, nude stockings, and hair always nicely pulled back. But on the weekends, she’s completely different. Rocking the motorcycle look, she wears things like leather jackets, suede brown boots, a big white purse, a black cashmere scarf, hair down in surfer-girl curls, quirky big black prescripted glasses that resemble Ray Ban shades, and black tights.

Mannerisms:

Habits: She’s a social drinker, she’ll go out with her friends or wife on Friday nights and have a drink or two, but never a sloppy drunk.

Health: Good

Hobbies: Writing, taking long peaceful walks in the rain and sun, watching movies, cuddling with her wife, and decorating-anything.

Favorite Sayings: “Don’t waste yourself in rejection, nor bark against the bad, but chant the beauty of the good.” (Ralph Waldo Emmerson)

“All claims of education notwithstanding, the pupil will accept only that which his mind craves.” (Emma Goldman)

Speech patterns:

Disabilities: None

Greatest flaw: Is prideful and usually does not give in when someone decides to shut her out. She doesn’t mind letting go of people and cutting relationships off because she is strong-minded and focuses only on her goals.

Best quality: Extremely understanding and giving. She is opened to helping anyone, even if it’s just a stranger. Puts time and effort into anything she does.

Intellectual/Mental/Personality Attributes and Attitudes

Educational Background: She’s attended private/Catholic school from kindergarten through 8^th grade (Immaculate Conception), which was sometimes a struggle for her parents to maintain for two daughters; both $500 every two months. She then entered the portfolio Beacon High school, where she overall exceeded on average until graduation. Because of most of her hard work and demonstrations of such, she got accepted to Hunter College and is still attending.

Intelligence Level: She is highly philosophical, strong in beliefs on almost everything she comes across, even as simple as an abandoned building or broken-down garden. She researches plenty, as a habit to her job but also as a hobby, she enjoys learning new ideas and events that might either support or denounce her opinion. Motivated to learn, received high 80’s and 90’s most of her high school career, as well as mostly A’s in college so far.

Any Mental Illnesses? No

Learning Experiences: Academically, she once did an internship in 10^th grade for news anchorwoman Roma Torre in NY1 news channel. That was her opportunity to work closely with someone involved in writing informative and concise for the media. That’s where her passion sparked. In 9^th grade, while being distant from her family, she felt so depressed she jumped into the Hudson River. A stranger jumped in to save her, but she was traumatized. She swore that no one would ever control her emotions. She didn’t want to be manipulated by her family; she was fearful but would never admit it. And this is when she became stronger.

Character's short-term goals in life: Her short-term goal in life is simply to wake up everyday and feel happy and enthused to work. To always have something to be passionate about.

Character's long-term goals in life: To have a child, and eventually develop some kind of relationship with at least one of her parents, and her sister. She wants to have the courage to tell her parents she’s homosexual and married to a woman. Her major issue is, she knows they will not be welcoming or accepting.

How does Character see himself/herself? Ewa sees herself as confident. She’s always been calm and satisfied with what she’s been given, in terms of physical features, attitude, and mentality. She’s self-aware in a positive way, and she’s got an untouchable beauty that she never has to work hard to illustrate. The only thing she’s ever pushed herself with, is academics. And not only academics, but knowledge. She’s always been hard on what she knows and doesn’t know, striving to know more like it’s a competition for mass money.

How does Character believe he/she is perceived by others? She is well-known. She believes she is liked but she knows her co-workers and other acquaintances talk about her independence with a negative tone, saying “she needs a man,” and “she’s so beautiful I wonder why she’s always alone.” Ewa laughs because “ignorance is bliss”, she doesn’t take it to heart because even if they don’t know it, they are degrading themselves simply by saying that beautiful women need men. She lets people talk because she’s got plenty of greatness to look forward to.

Does the character seem ruled by emotion or logic or some combination thereof?

What would most embarrass this character? Ewa would be embarrassed by things like hanging in crowds of people- it makes her nervous as well. She doesn’t like when public attention is attracted to her for any reason. She walks either looking up at the sky, or around at scenery, or down at her blackberry. She doesn’t pay much attention to normal day-to-day people because they’re irrelevant. Ewa expresses emotion mostly through writing. Sometimes, in order to resolve issues at home, she needs to write her wife a letter, even if she’s sitting right in front of her. It’s ironic because a person who studies journalism also studies public speaking and communication. But somehow emotions can be tricky for Ewa.

Emotional Characteristics

Strengths/Weaknesses:

Introvert or Extrovert? She’s a mixture/complex. She can easily talk to someone on certain levels, but other times she’s more to herself. This is mostly because she’s very observant. She feels like most words don’t need to be said. They’re always conveyed in different ways, such as experience or writing.

How does the character deal with anger? Ewa rarely gets heated, and because she is very peaceful normally, she doesn’t know how exactly to cope with anger. She has never gone overboard since the Hudson River incident, but if her family finds out about her secret life, she is capable of spiraling out of control. Throwing things, breaking things, hitting things and maybe even people, slamming doors, yelling, crying…completely erupted.

With change?

With loss? She becomes more of an introvert. She’d rather be distanced from everyone so she can deal with her pain inside all by herself.

What does the character want out of life? Ewa wants to love and be revered. She wants to raise children and teach them how to be just as headstrong, but never to feel like they have to deal with anything alone, like she did when she was a kid.

What would the character like to change in his/her life? Her relationship with her sister, Regina, most definitely. She’s the only person Ewa would like to sincerely impress.

What motivates this character?

What frightens this character? The thought of dying without being loved by her family the correct, unconditional way.

What makes this character happy? Being at home with her wife, Essence, watching movies, cuddling, writing, cooking. She enjoys peaceful walks outside on rainy and sunny days. And the thought of her upcoming child enthralls her.

Is the character judgmental of others? She is not at all a judgmental person. She likes to think of herself as less human as possible. She wants to be a spirit; a single species that does not take on jealousy or temptation or criticism of others’ faults. She’s the type that gives compliments to complete strangers.

Is the character generous or stingy? Generous !!

Is the character generally polite or rude? Polite !!

Spiritual Characteristics

Does the character believe in God? She believes that God is the higher power, but she believes without structure. She simply feels that God loves everyone, no matter who they are or what they do. She believes in equality among the human race.

What are the character's spiritual beliefs? She’s a spiritual person in terms of the earth. She’s very “green” and also a vegan. She believes in saving all living creatures. She’s meditative and she takes time out her day regularly to reflect on herself, to be alone, to vision her importance and the importance of the people around her, and to digest life one day at a time.

Is religion or spirituality a part of this character's life? She’s a non-practicing Christian. She does believe in God and she does pray at times, but she doesn’t go to church or even read the Bible.

Journal #5- 6 sentence fiction

Broken Soul

He had a secret, the man on the train with the black slacks, a matching blazer, and an orange tie- a heavy golden band weigh down his left ring finger. The clocks meshed time together as one day accidentally fell into the next; paying attention to nobody, he was in a field of stillness since the incident. The cherished memories of laughter and endless love dragged him to hell, while belittling the fact that he was an outcast, a stranger even, in a world filled with ongoing exclusivity and friendships. Bitter, he couldn’t smile at the warmth of others’ alacrity, or hide behind the professionalism of his thriving business. He knew nothing, he was nothing, he craved nothing-his husband was dead, and took his life with him to the grave.

Journal #4b- 6 word memoir

I manage to ruin everything...everything.

Journal # 4a- 6 word fiction

Her pain was camouflaged by rain.

Journal #3- "In Medias Res"

“Tell me! What do I do Josh??”
“Run! Run!” Johnny’s older brother yelled in panic. Every night in Amsterdam the sky went pitch black, with small twinkles shining down. But not tonight, for some reason the stars were too afraid. They hid behind the black blanket covering half the earth. Josh and Johnny didn’t notice. Like boys, they continued playing “Crash Bandicoot” on their Play Station 2. Their attention wasn’t in any way on the hot, steaming kitchen. Together, they forgot. The machine was about to explode. How were they supposed to know their gaming competition would separate them forever?

Final Draft!

A Hefty Affliction

Kalidas’ world started and ended in the center of New York. The livelier metropolitan area of the Lower East Side was the core of his being till he met her. Musiq seemed like just another girl at Neighborhood High school. But this thin Puerto Rican with beautiful hips, lips, and style had no shame in stealing his life away. Soon after they started dating, his heart was shattered like thick glass. She played too many games- cheating, leaving. His heart was too tender to condone immaturity. But, no mistake defines Kalidas like the one that made him lose the trust of the one he loved. On the peak of his high school career at Neighborhood, he started doing something his momma advised him to do- wait to date.

“K, don’t go foolin’ around with non’a these street girls, you hear? They only after one thang. Now my baby is handsome and got smarts. You be above them. Don’t make me say ‘I told you so’ son,” his mom warned.

“Yeah ma. I know. Thanks for always havin’ my back. I got you,” Kalidas brushed her off. His mom was always protective, never wanted him out of her sight. But she had a reason. Kalidas got everything he wanted. With almond-shaped hazel eyes, toned abs and biceps, flowing café curly hair, he was developed as can be. Regardless of his mom’s warnings and apprehension, he turned to find Musiq’s blue eyes chasing him down the halls, knocking him out the ring, and blowing the wind out of his diaphragm. Looking back on it, his thoughts stuck, “why did I ever…?” His vivid memory attacked his mental health as he sat in his room about a year after that day, thinking about what could have been, had he not gave into those two ocean-like eyes, with waves that drowned out his lungs.

Rage, banging headaches, even anxiety attacks is what that latina led him to. A mixture of a rosy pink and morbid grey lied beneath his eyes, exhausted from sickness, sick from exhaustion. His body trembled to the thought of another lie; he’d think his life was a game of “BS”, a card game to be tampered with, an arena of cheating. Musiq was the carpet under his feet, but she ripped herself away and he pulsed with rug burn. His heart, crashing with an echoing THUD, ripping itself to shreds, made him become accustomed to keeping his head up. Eyes looking up, he found his “confidant”. Every single night, like a mom singing her baby a lullaby, Avery was the remedy to his screeching, rotting heart. Inevitably, yet so unexpectedly, she took the steering wheel and spiraled his life in the opposite direction. Avery’s easygoing attitude, understanding, kindness, and inner beauty slowly started to reconnect all the broken arteries, keeping the blood pumping from his love organ. She was, after all, Musiq’s reverse. She wrote him poetry many nights, each expressing how delicately she’d treat him, like a white rose in a garden of sunflowers.

I know no one’s perfect but damn you come close

From your mind, to your style, I bet every chick want a dose

A dose of what you got will send my body in total shock

My thoughts run crazy and my heart kind’a wanna stop-

But when I catch myself, I regain composure

You’re rare not like Mr. Clean with hair but like a four-leaf clover

And damn boo let me add how you’re a true soldier

Going through what you been through ain’t no walk in the park

But it’s sick how you can shine and light everything that’s dark.

You got the looks and the attitude to crush a kid’s game

Make her wanna keep you, if you hear what I’m sayin’

“Hey Av, how you doin’?” would be the highlight of my day,

And if you don’t mind, I’d like to keep it that way.

Cause there’s somethin’ about your swag that got me going mad

And damn Usher’s song is tight cause Av, “You got it bad”

I definitely do, but that’s just fine.

I don’t mind, I’m here for you anytime boo.

Twists. Kalidas warding off the tyrant caused rumors, stating that Musiq caught “feelies” and tenderly-coated kisses in Staircase B. Somehow those were the messages that got back to his newfound savior, Avery, at her school, LaGuardia. While he was in a battle of territory, Avery held up the rumors and tried to distract herself from the irrevocable pain she knew she’d feel if the rumors were true.

“Do you love her??” Musiq cried. But even though Kalidas responded with a terrifying yes, Avery sat in her room, crying over every possibility. Hurt, but refusing to show weakness, she sent Kalidas an email:

I know this is unexpected, but I just can’t do this. I love you and I always will, but you expect me to stand here and take all these blows, hearing about you fooling around with your ex. Someone trustworthy told me they saw you in Tompkins Square with Musiq, kissing her! And that isn’t supposed to hurt me? You’re already doing me dirty and it’s only the beginning. I won’t bite bullets for you anymore, I’m covered in your gun powder and it’s burned me to the bone. Goodbye Kalidas.

The closer Kalidas got to the end of reading, the more the waterworks built up. Snapping his phone up to call Avery, he broke into a run. Without reason, his feet moved swiftly across the pavement, as he heard a cherubic voice answer. Immediately, “I DON’T KNOW WHO TOLD YOU THAT, BUT I WOULD NEVER FUCKING DO THAT TO YOU. I LOVE YOU A, PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME.” His projectile tears caught him unexpectedly, and apparently, was contagious. Avery began to choke up. Even though she had no trust in him, she had faith for the future, and ended the conversation. “Maybe we can be together in the future Kalidas. I’ll talk to you later.” Click.

Spite took over his spine as his body shook in retaliation. The unusual energy surged over him like a giant heat wave. He wanted to ruin the life of the one who ruined his relationship. So the very next day, he went to school and met with Musiq.

“Baby, have you thought about us?” Musiq asked, giving off easy signals as she slid her long tanned leg up Kalidas’ thigh.

“Yes, and I decided I want you…” Kalidas couldn’t even choke out her name. He knew he only meant that to one girl. He told her to meet him after school so they could make up for lost time, managing to keep a straight face. Musiq, of course, smiled with alacrity as she knew what that signified. Going on through his day, Kalidas did not think twice about the decision he started to make. It seemed as though time flew by. Before he knew it, he was taking the F train side by side with Musiq to her house on The Avenue. The supposedly short ride might as well have gone to Coney Island, hours were seemingly passing by. Musiq held onto him tight, playing with his fingers and giggling in his ear, however, Kalidas forcibly smiled through his aching regret. Kalidas anticipated the end of his scheme. He was going to do what the streets called “beat it and leave it”. This will definitely make her leave me alone, right?, he thought to himself, hoping to destroy her heart the way she had snatched his. All his thinking, he barely noticed she was taking her keys out to open the door to her apartment. 2F; it looked like a door hinged with extra locks, a dungeon with bars he’d never escape from. Begrudgingly, he entered. Musiq started to cry.

“Shh, don’t cry, you got me,” Kalidas snapped. He quietly led her to the room, laid her down and started stripping off particles of clothing. Her firm breasts embraced him as he took the last of her clothes off. When her panties hit the floor, he realized what he was doing, but it was too late to stop. He pushed forward, wasting no time with kisses or neck pleasures. He thrust himself into her wetness, knowing it would be no problem to fit. He let her body feel the false love, let her imagine him catching her every time she falls from grace. As he was committing his sexual sin, he couldn’t help but let his mind wander. Mmm the smell of Avery’s sweet Coach Perfume she wore daily was filling his nostrils. He became convincingly aroused, imagining another world- another girl, while Musiq thought she was it. Watching her slow movements in sync with his, and hearing her roars echoing off the walls, he knew this was it. He no longer had a connection to Musiq. When he was done proving himself, he got up, feeling a gross satisfactory in the pit of his stomach. He reapplied his clothes as quickly as he took hers off.

“Where you goin’? No te vayas bebe,” Musiq’s desperation spoke for itself.

“I gotta go, told my mom I’d be home. Hit you later,” and just like that, it was over. There was only one thing left to do, without question. Beg my woman to take me back…beg my woman to take me back… almost chanting within himself. He gave Avery his heart on purpose, and he crushed Musiq’s heart on purpose, but he couldn’t let it show. His conscience ate him alive. He knew if Avery ever found out, there’d be no chance, and betrayal would sweep over her so fast she’d reach a heart attack. She was the victim of his crime. By then, the disease called “love” was killing him inside.

Draft 2

A Hefty Affliction

Kalidas’ world started and ended in the center of New York. The livelier metropolitan area of the Lower East Side was the core of his being till he met her. Musiq seemed like just another girl in Neighborhood high school. But this thin Puerto Rican with beautiful hips, lips, and style had no shame in stealing his life away. Soon after they started dating, his heart was shattered like thick glass. She played too many games, cheating, leaving. His heart was too tender to condone immaturity. But, no mistake defines Kalidas like the one that made him lose the trust of the one he loved. On the peak of his high school career in Neighborhood, he started doing what his momma advised him to do- wait to date.

“K, don’t go foolin’ around with non’a these street girls, you hear? They only after one thang. Now my baby is handsome and got smarts. You be above them. Don’t make me say ‘I told you so son,” his mom warned.

“Yeah ma. I know. Thanks for always havin’ my back. I got you,” Kalidas brushed her off. His mom was always protective, never wanted him out of her sight. But she had a reason. Kalidas got everything he wanted. With almond-shaped hazel eyes, toned abs and biceps, flowing café curly hair, he was developed as can be. Regardless of his mom’s warnings and apprehension, he turned to find Musiq’s blue eyes chasing him down the halls, knocking him out the ring, and blowing the wind out of his diaphragm. Looking back on it, his thoughts stuck, “why did I ever…?” His vivid memory attacked his mental health as he sat in his room about a year after that day, thinking about what could have been had he not gave into those two ocean-like eyes, with waves that drowned out his lungs.

Rage, banging headaches, even anxiety attacks is what that latina led him to. A mixture of a rosy pink and morbid grey lay beneath his eyes, exhausted from sickness, sick from exhaustion. His body trembled to the thought of another lie; he’d think his life was a game of “BS”, a card game to be tampered with, an arena of cheating. Musiq was the carpet under his feet, but she ripped herself away and he’s paused with rug burn. His heart, crashing with an echoing THUD, ripping itself to shreds, has become accustomed to keeping his head up. Eyes looking up, he found his “confidant”. Every single night, like a mom singing her baby a lullaby, Avery was the remedy to his screeching, rotting heart. Inevitably, yet so unexpectedly, she took the steering wheel and spiraled his life in the opposite direction. Avery’s easygoing attitude, understanding, kindness, and inner beauty slowly started to reconnect all the broken arteries, keeping the blood pumping from his love organ. She wrote him poetry many nights, each expressing how delicately she’d treat him, like a white rose in a garden of sunflowers.

I know no one’s perfect but damn you come close
From your mind, to your style, I bet every chick want a dose
A dose of what you got will send my body in total shock
My thoughts run crazy and my heart kind’a wanna stop-
But when I catch myself, I regain composure
You’re rare not like Mr. Clean with hair but like a four-leaf clover
And damn boo let me add how you’re a true soldier
Going through what you been through ain’t no walk in the park
But it’s sick how you can shine and light everything that’s dark.
You got the looks and the attitude to crush a kid’s game
Make her wanna keep you, if you hear what I’m sayin’
“Hey Av, how you doin’?” would be the highlight of my day,
And if you don’t mind, I’d like to keep it that way.
Cause there’s somethin’ about your swag that got me going mad
And damn Usher’s song is tight cause Av, “You got it bad”
I definitely do, but that’s just fine.
I don’t mind, I’m here for you anytime boo.

Twists. Kalidas warding off the tyrant caused rumors, stating that Musiq caught “feelies” and tenderly-coated kisses in Staircase B. Somehow those were the messages that got back to his newfound savior, Avery, at her school, LaGuardia. While he was in a battle of territory, Avery held up the rumors and tried to distract herself from the irrevocable pain she’d feel if the rumors were true.

“Do you love her??” Musiq cried. But even though Kalidas responded with a terrifying yes, Avery sat in her room, crying over every possibility. Hurt, but refusing to show weakness, she sent Kalidas an email:

I know this is unexpected, but I just can’t do this. I love you and I always will, but you expect me to stand here and take all these blows, hearing about you fooling around with your ex. Someone trustworthy told me they saw you in Tompkins Square with Musiq, kissing her! And that isn’t supposed to hurt me? You’re already doing me dirty and it’s only the beginning. I won’t bite bullets for you anymore, I’m covered in your gun powder and it’s burned me to the bone. Goodbye Kalidas.

The closer Kalidas got to the end of reading, the more the waterworks built up. Snapping his phone up to call Avery, he broke into a run. Without reason, his feet moved swiftly across the pavement, as he heard a cherubic voice answer. Immediately, “I DON’T KNOW WHO TOLD YOU THAT, BUT I WOULD NEVER FUCKING DO THAT TO YOU. I LOVE YOU A, PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME.” His projectile tears caught him unexpectedly, and apparently was contagious. Avery began to choke up. Even though she had no trust in him, she had faith for the future, and ended the conversation. “Maybe we can be together in the future Kalidas. I’ll talk to you later.”

Spite took over his spine as his body shook in retaliation. The unusual energy surged over him like a giant heat wave. He wanted to ruin the life of the one who ruined his relationship. So the very next day, he went to school and met with Musiq.

“Baby, have you thought about us?” Musiq asked, giving off easy signals as she slid her long tanned leg up Kalidas’ thigh.

“Yes, and I decided I want you…” Kalidas couldn’t even choke out her name. He knew he only meant that to one girl. He told her to meet him after school so they could make up for lost time, managing to keep a straight face. Musiq, of course, smiled with alacrity as she knew what that signified. Going on through his day, Kalidas did not think twice about the decision he started to make. It seemed as though time flew by. Before he knew it, he was taking the F train side by side with Musiq to her house near Delancey. The supposedly short ride might as well have gone to Coney Island, hours were seemingly passing by. Musiq held onto him tight, playing with his fingers and giggling in his ear. However, Kalidas forcibly smiled through his aching regret. Kalidas anticipated the end of his scheme. He was going to do what the streets called “beat it and leave it”. “This will definitely make her leave me alone, right?” he thought to himself, hoping to destroy her heart the way she had snatched his. All his thinking, he barely noticed she was taking her keys out to open the door to her apartment. 2F; it looked like a door hinged with extra locks, a dungeon with bars he’d never escape from. Begrudgingly, he entered. Musiq started to cry.

“Shh, don’t cry, you got me,” Kalidas snapped. He quietly led her to the room, laid her down and started stripping off particles of clothing. Her firm breasts embraced him as he took the last of her clothes off. When her panties hit the floor, he realized what he was doing, but it was too late to stop. He pushed forward, wasting no time with kisses or neck pleasures. He thrust himself into her wetness, knowing it would be no problem to fit. He let her body feel the false love, let her imagine him catching her every time she falls from grace. As he was committing his sexual sin, he couldn’t help but let his mind wander. Mmm, the smell of Avery’s sweet Coach Perfume she wore daily was filling his nostrils. He became convincingly aroused, imagining another world- another girl, while Musiq thought she was it. Watching her slow movements in sync with his, and hearing her roars echoing off the walls, he knew this was it. He no longer had a connection to Musiq. When he was done proving himself, he got up feeling a gross satisfactory in the pit of his stomach. He reapplied his clothes as quickly as he took hers off.

“Where you goin’? No te vayas bebe,” Musiq’s desperation spoke for itself.

“I gotta go, told my mom I’d be home. Hit you later,” and just like that, it was over. There was only one thing left to do, without question. “Beg my woman to take me back…beg my woman to take me back…” almost chanting within himself. He gave Avery his heart on purpose, and he crushed Musiq’s heart on purpose, but he couldn’t let it show. His conscience ate him alive. He knew if Avery ever found out, there’d be no chance, and betrayal would sweep over her so fast she’d reach a heart attack. She was the victim of his crime. By then, the disease called “love” was killing him inside.

Fiction Story Draft 1

A Hefty Affliction

Kalidas’ world started and ended in the center of New York. The livelier metropolitan area of the Lower East Side was the core of his being till he met her. Musiq seemed like just another girl at Neighborhood High school. But this thin Puerto Rican with beautiful hips, lips, and style had no shame in steeling his life away. No mistake defines Kalidas like the one that made him lose the trust of the one he loved. On the peak of his high school career at Neighborhood, he started doing something his momma advised him to wait for-dating. “K, don’t go foolin’ around with non’a these street girls, you hear? They only after one thang. Now my baby is handsome and got smarts. You be above them. Don’t make me say ‘I told you so son,” his mom warned.

“Yeah ma. I know. Thanks for always havin’ my back. I got you,” Kalidas brushed off. His mom was always protective, never wanted him out her sight. But she had a reason. Kalidas got everything he wanted. With almond-shaped hazel eyes, toned abs and biceps, flowing café curly hair, he was developed as can be. Regardless of his mom’s warnings and apprehension, he turned to find Musiq’s blue eyes chasing him down the halls, knocking him out the ring, and blowing the wind out of his diaphragm. Looking back on it, his thoughts stuck, “why did I ever…?” His vivid memory attacked his mental health as he sat in his room about a year after that day, thinking about what could have been had he not gave into those two oceans drowning out his lungs.

Rage, banging headaches, even anxiety attacks is what that latina led him to. A mixture of a rosy pink and morbid grey lied beneath his eyes, exhausted from sickness, sick from exhaustion. His body trembled to the thought of another lie; he’d think his life was a game of “BS”, a card game to be tampered with, an arena of cheating. Musiq was the carpet under his feet, but she ripped herself away and he’s paused with rug burn. His heart, crashing with an echoing THUD, ripping itself to shreds, has become accustomed to keeping his head up. Eyes looking up, he found his “confidant”. Every single night, like a mom singing her baby a lullaby, Avery was the remedy to his screeching, rotting heart. Inevitably, yet so unexpectedly, she took the steering wheel and spiraled his life in the opposite direction. Avery’s easygoing attitude, understanding, kindness, and inner beauty slowly started to reconnect all the broken arteries, keeping the blood pumping from his love organ. She wrote him poetry many nights, each expressing how delicately she’d treat him, like a white rose in a garden of sunflowers.

I know no one’s perfect but damn you come close
From your mind, to your style, I bet every chick want a dose
A dose of what you got will send my body in total shock
My thoughts run crazy and my heart kind’a wanna stop-
But when I catch myself, I regain composure
You’re rare not like Mr. Clean with hair but like a four-leaf clover
And damn boo let me add how you’re a true soldier
Going through what you been through ain’t no walk in the park
But it’s sick how you can shine and light everything that’s dark.
You got the looks and the attitude to crush a kid’s game
Make her wanna keep you, if you hear what I’m sayin’
“Hey Av, how you doin’?” would be the highlight of my day,
And if you don’t mind, I’d like to keep it that way.
Cause there’s somethin’ about your swag that got me going mad
And damn Usher’s song is tight cause Av, “You got it bad”
I definitely do, but that’s just fine.
I don’t mind, I’m here for you anytime boo.

Twists. Kalidas warding off the tyrant caused rumors, stating Musiq caught “feelies” and tenderly-coated kisses in Staircase B. Somehow those were the messages that got back to his newfound savior, Avery. While he was in a battle of territory, Avery held up the rumors and tried to distract herself from the irrevocable pain she’d feel if the rumors were true. “Do you love her??” Musiq cried. But even though Kalidas responded with a terrifying yes, Avery sat in her room, crying over every possibility. Hurt, but refusing to show weakness, she sent Kalidas an email:

I know this is unexpected, but I just can’t do this. I love you and I always will, but you expect me to stand here and take all these blows, hearing about you fooling around with your ex. Someone trustworthy told me they saw you in Tompkins Square with Musiq, kissing her! And that isn’t supposed to hurt me? You’re already doing me dirty and it’s only the beginning. I won’t bite bullets for you anymore, I’m covered in your gun powder and it’s burned me to the bone. Goodbye Kalidas.

The closer Kalidas got to the end of reading, the more the waterworks built up. Snapping his phone up to call Avery, he broke into a run. Without reason, his feet moved swiftly across the pavement, as he heard a cherubic voice answer. Immediately, “I DON’T KNOW WHO TOLD YOU THAT, BUT I WOULD NEVER FUCKING DO THAT TO YOU. I LOVE YOU A, PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME.” His projectile tears caught him unexpectedly, and apparently was contagious. Avery began to choke up. Even though she had no trust in him, she had faith for the future, and ended the conversation with a doubtful “maybe we can be together in the future Kalidas. I’ll talk to you later.”

Spite took over his spine as his body shook in retaliation. The unusual energy surged over him like a giant heat wave. He wanted to ruin the life of the one who ruined his relationship. So the very next day, he went to school and met with Musiq. “Baby, have you thought about us?” Musiq asked, giving off easy signals as she slid her long tanned leg up Kalidas’ thigh.

“Yes, and I decided I want you…” Kalidas couldn’t even choke out her name. He knew he only meant that to one girl. He told her to meet him after school so they could make up for lost time, managing to keep a straight face. Musiq, of course, smiled with alacrity as she knew what that signified. Going on through his day, Kalidas did not think twice about the decision he started to make. It seemed as though time flew by, before he knew it, he was taking the F train side by side with Musiq to her house on 12th street. The supposedly short ride might as well have gone to Coney Island, hours were seemingly passing by. Musiq held onto him tight, playing with his fingers and giggling in his ear, however, Kalidas forcibly smiled through his aching regret. Kalidas anticipated the end of his scheme. He was going to do what the streets called “beat it and leave it”. “This will definitely make her leave me alone, right?” he thought to himself, hoping to destroy her heart the way she had snatched his. All his thinking, he barely noticed she was taking her keys out to open the door to her apartment. 2F; it looked like a door hinged with extra locks, a dungeon with bars he’d never escape from. Begrudgingly, he entered. Musiq started to cry.

“Shh, don’t cry, you got me,” Kalidas snapped. He quietly led her to the room, laid her down and started stripping off particles of clothing. Her firm breasts embraced him as he took the last of her clothes off. When her panties hit the floor, he realized what he was doing, but it was too late to stop. He pushed forward, wasting no time with kisses or neck pleasures. He thrust himself into her wetness, knowing it would be no problem to fit. He let her body feel the false love, let her imagine him catching her every time she falls from grace. As he was committing his sexual sin, he couldn’t help but let his mind wander. Mmm the smell of Avery’s sweet Coach Perfume she wore daily was filling his nostrils. He became convincingly aroused, imagining another world- another girl, while Musiq thought she was it. Watching her slow movements in sync with his, and hearing her roars echoing off the walls, he knew this was it. He no longer had a connection to Musiq. When he was done proving himself, he got up feeling a gross satisfactory in the pit of his stomach. He reapplied his clothes as quickly as he took hers off.

“Where you goin’? No te vayas bebe,” Musiq’s desperation spoke for itself.

“I gotta go, told my mom I’d be home. Hit you later,” and just like that, it was over. There was only one thing left to do, without question. “Beg my woman to take me back…beg my woman to take me back…” almost chanting within himself. He gave Avery his heart on purpose, and he crushed Musiq’s heart on purpose, but he couldn’t let it show. His conscience ate him alive. He knew if Avery ever found out, there’d be no chance, and betrayal would sweep over her so fast she’d reach a heart attack. She was the victim of his crime. By then, the disease called “love” was killing him inside.