Journal #2 (Slow Motion)

Sentence: Elena stormed in her room and stubbed her toe on the edge of the bed.

Paragraph: Elena entered the house quietly, trying not to disturb her sleeping mom and brother. It was 1 AM. Suddenly, her mom came out and yelled at her timing, "It's way passed curfew! You're punished, that's it." Elena couldn't even argue back. She stormed into her dark room, thinking about the boy she was just with who tried to rape her. While she tried to walk around her bed, her rapid steps made her stumble and hit her toe on the edge. With her big toe now throbbing, she howled out in pain and gritted her teeth.

Slow Motion: After fighting with her mom over curfew, Elena stormed in her room. She rapidly stepped through the door and around her bed, thinking about why she was late today. The boy, who was all over her at the party dragged her limp body into a room, choking her out cries. How come her mom didn't even care to hear her story? The hour she spent struggling to break free from him was punishable? As her foot swung and made way for the edge of the bed, Elena thought of her mom's high-pitched yell. She must have felt worried, that's all, she thought. Her mom would think no lower of her if she told her the truth. Her leg, still moving toward the bed, was out of control. Her tears blocked her vision and she wanted to go back and explain to her mom, so she' d understand. Elena's toe poked out in her defense and slammed into the edge of the bed.The throb of her toe reflected her fast-pulsing heart.